


got all these hearts in a line, they all wasting their time ('cause only you do me right)

by violntine



Series: Expectations [3]
Category: Power Rangers (2017)
Genre: Adolescent Sexuality, Alternate Universe - No Powers, Bullying, F/F, Friends to Lovers, Homophobic Language, Implied/Referenced Homophobia, Light Angst
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-04-07
Updated: 2018-04-07
Packaged: 2019-04-19 14:22:48
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 6,729
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14239164
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/violntine/pseuds/violntine
Summary: Some mornings it’s too hard to look at herself in the mirror so she just doesn’t. Too afraid to see the person she’s become staring back at her; a reflection of someone she doesn’t know.orKimberly befriends the new girl and ends up realising a few things about herself along the way.





	got all these hearts in a line, they all wasting their time ('cause only you do me right)

**Author's Note:**

> Hello, hello!
> 
> So, I'm oddly proud of this fic, mostly because I wanted to challenge myself by writing in Kim's POV instead of Trini's for a change, and I think I did okay(?) Let me know! Comments & kudos' are appreciated.
> 
> Title is from 'Wanna be Missed' by Hayley Kiyoko.
> 
> http://sabertoothhart.tumblr.com/

Kimberly Hart has always thrived on the attention from countless boy when she walked through the corridors of Angel Grove High. It’s not that she thinks of herself so highly, that she’s some sort of goddess among her peers. In fact, it’s the exact opposite for her. Some mornings it’s too hard to look at herself in the mirror so she just doesn’t. Too afraid to see the person she’s become staring back at her; a reflection of someone she doesn’t know.

The attention she receives at school helps build up the facade that she’s content with her life; that she’s the typical head cheerleader, minus the bitchy attitude. No, she’s never been one for making other people’s life miserable, that’s more her best friend’s job. No matter how many times she tries to tell Amanda to drop it, she continues, relentless. Picking on anyone who may seem a little more different than them.

Why they’re best friends is still up to questioning for Kimberly. She assumes it’s mostly because they’d grown up together and spent majority of their time together talking about how they’re going to be friends forever, but other than that, they share no common interests. Kimberly’s too aware while Amanda is… Well, let’s just say that she isn’t necessarily good with reading a situation. She’s always been far too concerned with her own problems and emotions. Too fixated on makingsure that she is the centre of attention while others are constantly reminded of how they’re beneath her.

Speaking of, her latest target is the new girl. Deedee, is her name, Kimberly thinks. At least, that’s what Amanda’s been calling her, so it’s hard to say.

She doesn’t speak much, tends to stick by herself rather than joining a crowd where she might encounter a little less of Amanda’s wrath. That makes her stand out even more, along with the different beanies worn each day and how her clothes practically scream that she’s not your typical teenage girl.

Kimberly likes her style, particularly how her hair is always braided on one side. It leaves the crook of her neck exposed, and Kimberly wonders what it would be like to brush her fingertips over the bare surface.

“…Got that, Deedee?”

And, okay. Kimberly must’ve missed the whole exchange of Amanda explaining who’s in charge of the school, how they don’t regularly accept _outsiders._ She’d been too busy staring at the shorter girl in front of them, standing by her locker, who’s paying no mind to Kimberly; attempting to really see what’s behind that impassive gaze.

Nothing, apparently. There’s no flicker of any other emotion even as she goes to answer.

“It’s Trini.” Is all she says, and that actually makes sense.

_Trini sounds much better than Deedee, especially when accompanied with that accent of hers._

“I don’t care. Just make sure you stay out of our way, okay?”

Amanda gives that smile that Kimberly knows means nothing but trouble and waits. For what, Kimberly doesn’t know. She’s probably expecting Trini to shake and tremble under her words, but that doesn’t happen.

Trini shuts her locker door and starts to walk away, pushing past Amanda with a little force in her shoulder that ends up with the cheerleader stumbling back slightly.

Kimberly’s there to catch her, letting her hands rest along her friend’s shoulders as she goes to regain her balance.

“Whatever.” She hears Trini mumble just as she’s walking past Kimberly, and for the first time since Amanda decided on a whim to approach Trini, they make eye contact. Right before the smaller girl disappears into the dissipating crowd.

It’s brief, only lasting for a second, but it’s enough to make Kimberly’s stomach explode into what feels like butterflies dancing all around. How she feels when a boy so much as offers a glance her way — it’s nothing compared to _this._

“That stupid bitch. I’m going to make her life a living hell!”

Amanda’s shouts snap her out of the trance that has her wanting nothing more than to chase after the girl, and for all the reasons her friend couldn’t begin to understand.

Kimberly stays quiet as they walk to class together, far too busy on settling the storm that has been created inside her by one girl.

———————

Kimberly and Trini have biology together.

No Amanda to make snarky comments at everything Trini does. Just them.

It’s been a few days since their last encounter and since then, Kimberly hasn’t been able to get the girl off her mind. She thought that the infatuation would fade away after the first time they (barley) interacted, but no such thing is yet to occur.

Kimberly only feels her need to be close or _anything_ with the girl growing, prompting her to be first out of her seat and making her way towards the back of the room when the teacher says they’ll being doing assignments in pairs. Her feet are moving before she realises, but even then she does nothing to stop herself. She’s standing in front of Trini’s desk, who’s too occupied doodling in her book to notice Kimberly is there.

“Guess you’re here to remind me of how much of a loser I am?”

Okay, maybe she does know Kimberly is there.

“What? No.” She scrunches up her nose in bewilderment before continuing, “We’re supposed to work in pairs and I thought we could be together.”

Trini’s movements of her hand comes to a stop and she finally glances up at Kimberly, arching a brow. The glimmer of mischief hidden beneath her gaze is shown, though only for a split second. Kimberly catches on.

“I mean, we can work together! On the assignment. That’s it. ” Her poor choice of words has her thrown into a fumbling mess, much to Trini’s delight. The faint smirk appearing on her features makes the bundle of emotions deep in her stomach more apparent than ever.

“You and me?” Trini asks for clarification, but Kimberly thinks that it’s just to further mess with her, to push her buttons until she can no longer take it and ends up spewing out a bunch of insults.

She nods.

Trini looks over her. Once, twice and then returns the nod. “Okay, Kimberly. We can work together.”

“Great! How about we start it at my place this afternoon? We’ll have the whole house to ourselves.” she pauses, “and you can call me Kim.”

The look that she gets in return is only an implication that her choice in words again hasn’t been really well thought-out, however unlike last time, she doesn’t give Trini the satisfaction of giving a reaction. She sticks by her statement, waiting for Trini to either accept or turn Kimberly away.

“Sounds good, Kim.” I’ll meet you in the carpark afterwards.” And at that, Trini’s back to sketching all over the page opened in her book, abruptly ending the conversation.

Kimberly meant to spend the reminder of the class planning everything out with Trini, but seeing as the girl has no interest in starting it now, and her confidence is slightly deflated after the less than a minute interaction, Kimberly retreats to her own desk at the front of the room.

She occupies herself with planning for their work when they’re back at her place, pushing away the part of her mind that’s dwelling on how Trini looked so perfect up close. The part that’s slightly panicking about the fact she’s going to be spending a few hours at least with that view.

For the last few minutes of class, Kimberly finds herself looking back in Trini’s direction more and more. It’s only the last time she looks does she end up regretting it, because Trini’s caught her in the act; making brief eye contact that now has Kimberly in a slight panic.

God, Trini probably thinks she’s a freak now, that she has some sort of obsession with her. And, well, even if that is kind of true, she doesn’t want Trini to know that, especially if it’s going to lead to some wrong impression. After Amanda’s little stunt in the corridor, who’s not to say that Trini’s already thinking that her invitation to the Hart residence this evening is going to end up with more thoughtless insults being hauled her way? Kimberly wouldn’t blame her if that is what’s going through her mind, except it isn’t the truth. Not even she knows what exactly the real truth is.

Kimberly’s a little afraid to find out.

As soon as the bell’s echoing through the rooms and hallway, she’s up and out of her seat, not even bothering to spare a glance back at Trini knowing that it’ll only end with her even more flustered than ever.

She’s both nervous and excited, yet the anxious part of herself is more dominant than the other, which is strange. Kimberly Hart is _never_ nervous, not for anyone. Not even for the cute boy that stands by her locker every morning and offers to carry her books, and meets her at the end of the day to walk her to her car.

He’s there now, for instance, waiting with his charming smile and dark locks that are supposed to make her heart swoon, but really they don’t do anything. Doesn’t even earn genuine smile from her, she has to fake that too.

“Hey, Ty.”

“Kim, fancy seeing you here.” His tone is dripping with that smug attitude that most teenage boys are known for.

“Well, it is _my_ locker. And I’ve seen you here almost everyday now.”

She doesn’t wait for him to move out of the way, just unlocks her locker and tugs it open, pushing the arm that was resting atop the surface off. He stumbles, but quickly regains his cool.

“Weird, huh?” Ty grins. “So, are you busy now? I was hoping we could go back to mine and just, y’know, chill.”

Kimberly knows where this is heading and she doesn’t like it one bit. She ignores the small voice in her head, which sounds suspiciously close to Amanda, telling her to go for it. Instead, her lips curve into an apologetic smile and she shakes her head. 

“Sorry, Ty, can’t. I have biology homework to do.” 

“Is that really going to take you all night?”

“Yes.”

By the time her bag is packed with the books needed for over the weekend, she slams her locker shut (maybe a little too hard) and turns to face the boy.

“Aw, c’mon, baby. Wouldn’t you rather spend a night with me instead of homework? I’m way more fun.”

She doubts that.

For a split second, though, she considers taking Ty up on his offer, thinking that one night of missing schoolwork won’t actually hurt her grades. Something in her features must give away her trail of thought because he’s looking at her like he’s actually succeeded. The streak of a yellow beanie suddenly appearing and then disappearing into the crowded hallways has her mind made.

Kimberly lifts her hand to rest on his shoulder, giving it a friendly, platonic squeeze. “Sorry, Ty. Maybe another time, okay?”

She doesn’t stick around to hear his response, just starts walking down the hall in the direction of the main carpark. Too fixated on catching up to the flash of yellow she already knows all too well.

Trini’s easy to spot under the glaring sun and sapphire sky, standing off to the side of the road, waiting for Kim’s arrival.

“Hey! There you are.” The sound of her voice must startle the shorter girl as seconds ago she’d been mindlessly tapping on her phone, and now she’s staring up at Kimberly, eyes slightly wide.

“Here I am. Told you this is where we’d meet.” Trini answers nonchalantly despite the mere fact that not even a moment ago she’d visibly jumped.

Kimberly’s nice enough not to mention it.

“Yep..” She’s back to being distracted, this time from the way the fading light is reflecting off of Trini’s sun-kissed skin, making her glow brighter than ever. Kimberly’s sure that right now in front of her is a real-life angel.

“So… Should we go, or are you just going to stand there and stare?”

Now it’s Kim’s turn to become flustered and try to play it cool. She fails, of course.

“Y-yeah, let’s go!”

Kim leads the way to where the car is parked and considers opening the passenger door for Trini, but before she can come to a decision, the girl is already doing it herself. There’s always next time.

The drive to Kim’s house is quiet, mostly because she isn’t too sure what they can talk about apart from Biology work. There’s a lot of questions right on the tip of her tongue, especially with the knowledge that Trini is new in Angel Grove, but she’s far too intimidated to bring up anything personal.

“Do you like donuts?”

Kim asks instead of one of the many heavyhearted questions, finding food the easiest way to lighten the mood.

They get back to Kim’s after a pitstop at Krispy Kreme, now accompanied with a box of different treats. She found out that Trini has a sweet tooth; her favourite donut being one filled with Jam.

Basic, but hers isn’t any better — a cinnamon-sugar donut — so she doesn’t say anything.

They’re about halfway through the box and having only spent the first half an hour talking about schoolwork when she decides that now’s a suitable time for a break. A Netflix break, to be precise. Because Trini had mentioned not knowing what The Good Place is, and that’s something Kim simply won’t stand for.

Trini’s making herself comfortable on the couch while Kim sets it up, immediately taking the empty spot beside the smaller girl. It’s strange how easy it is for her to act around Trini, despite only knowing her for a few days. Granted, their first meeting wasn’t really ideal, but she had nothing to do with Amanda’s antics.

Except she didn’t intervene and that kind of makes her a bystander, so that’s not really any better, right?

Kim’s so fixated on her thoughts and the overwhelming guilt forming in her gut that when they’re about ten minutes into the second episode, she can’t stop the apology from coming out. 

“I’m sorry.”

From the corner of her eye, she sees Trini turn her head and arch a brow, confusion written all over her face.

“About Amanda, I mean. The way she spoke to you the other day wasn’t cool and I just stood by and watched.”

It’s a relief for those words to be out there now. The severe weight on her chest now alleviated.

There’s a long, tense silence before Trini shows her acknowledgement towards Kim’s apology, she thinks that maybe Trini hadn’t heard her and she’d have to repeat herself, adding to her embarrassment.

“It’s cool. I don’t expect anything else from cheerleaders.”

Kim deserved that. She knows it, but the anger still settles inside her if this were any other day and if Amanda were here, she would most likely act on it. Yet, something about Trini holds her back.

“Hey…. I’m not like other cheerleaders.” Kim jokes, but to her own ears it comes off as weak and desperate.

Trini doesn’t pick up on it; smiles and keeps that curious expression, a tinge of playfulness in her eyes.

“Yeah? What kind of cheerleader are you then?”

Kim shrugs. She wasn’t expecting a question like that. “The nice kind?”

Trini scoffs.

“Sure, we’ll see about that, princess.”

The nickname is supposed to get on her nerves, but it actually does everything but that. There’s a warmth that spreads through her when Trini says it, though Kim can’t pinpoint exactly why it causes this reaction. Then again, she still doesn’t know why she’s been so mesmerised by the new girl since their first meeting, so Kim doesn’t ponder on it too much, decides maybe it’s because she didn’t want unnecessary bad blood with someone she barely knew, and forgets all about it.

The feeling remains when they go back to watching the show, spreading all through her arms and legs and to her face. Smiling far too wide and bright for it to be because of what’s happening on the screen in front of her, and not for who’s beside her.

———————

Kim and Trini start hanging out more after that. The excuse of having biology work together is long forgotten, and at first, that made her nervous. She didn’t know what would happen if one day she asked Trini out without an actual reason at hand, and since the girl isn’t one to actively seek out human interaction, Kim thought maybe it was pretty useless to even try. However, the unexpected happened.

Trini approached her one day after class, asking with a mumbled voice if Kim’d like to go get donuts with her. The way she avoided eye contact and had a trace of pinkness in her cheeks left a lot of questions running through Kim’s mind. For example, how could someone usually so composed and stoic be nervous about asking someone else to hang out? Later that afternoon, though very vague and cryptic, she learnt it was because Trini hadn’t had a lot of friends in her previous towns.

That broke her heart, further encouraging the unspoken desire in her to be Trini’s friend.

So, after countless evenings spent together and an exchange of phone numbers, Kim’s sure it’s safe to say they’re along the lines of being friends, even if Trini won’t admit it aloud herself. Nights of sharing donuts and drives home with banter that usually ends with Kim holding up the white flag aren’t things acquaintances do together. They don’t really hang out together during school, there’s only brief conversations and glances in the hallways greeting each other, and for some reason, it doesn’t feel like enough to Kim.

Sure, it makes her happy to have a friend like Trini; someone who’s honest no matter what and doesn’t give a shit about what others have to say. Some factors, however, make her sad. It upsets her when after a particularly rough day, she has to hear about the interrogation waiting for her at home, has to hear how Trini doesn’t know how to tell her parents what’s going on inside that head of hers before they eventually hang up due to sleep taking over.

Not even Kim knows what’s going on with Trini, and after spending hours talking to one another, through text or in person, learning every little thing about each other, she can see that it’s eating Trini alive. Slowly, whatever it is. And she wants to help, but at the same time she doesn’t know if it’s her place to bring it up.

It’s like she’s back to the first time she saw Trini; stuck between stopping Amanda from being her usual self or letting things be. Back then, she ignored the feeling in her gut screaming at her to _do something_ , and now she isn’t sure she can do the same thing.

———————

Among the evening routine of getting donuts together, they’ve also made a habit of visiting the Angel Grove mine.

Kim knows all about the spots in the quarry, since her house is literally only a ten minute walk from it, but somehow there was one she missed.

Trini showed it to her spontaneously after dwelling behind in Krispy Kreme for an hour, telling Kim there something important she had to show her. At first, she didn’t know what to think. The only thing she could do was listen as Trini instructed her on where to drive and park the car.

When they started hiking the side of a cliff, Kim got an idea of what was happening right now, but that didn’t prepare her for the view waiting at the top. At this distance, everything in Angel Grove could be seen; stretching all the way from the road leading to the small town, to the end, where the shore resided.

She was speechless, to say the least. Unable to muster the words that could describe how she felt in that moment, and that inexpressible feeling continued to expand when she glanced to the side, instantly captivated by her friend.

The sun setting in the horizon with an orangey tint mixed with gold spreading through the sky wasn’t the view, Kim decided. It couldn’t be; not when Trini was standing there, unknowingly looking so graceful. The loose strands of hair falling out of her beanie and onto her subtle features, all the way down to her jawline.

Trini caught her staring, and Kim couldn’t find it in her to appear embarrassed, regretful, because that wasn’t the truth. Couldn’t be when fondness flickered across Trini’s expression as she rolled her eyes, leaning in to gently nudge Kim in the ribs.

“What are you staring at, Hart?”

“Just enjoying the view.” 

In that moment, Kim swore she saw Trini blush, and that was the highlight of her day.

———————

Kim’s standing by Amanda’s locker, shifting from one foot to the other as she goes back and forth from thinking _‘you have to talk to her’_ to ‘ _it’s none of you business, just let it be’._ Her eyes are so fixated on down the hall, where Trini’s unoccupied locker is, that she doesn’t realise Amanda is talking until there’s a snapping of fingers right in front of her.

“Hey, Earth to Kimmy. Are you even listening to me?”

“What? Yeah, totally.”

Amanda doesn’t buy it.

“Sure. Anyway, what I said was, why are you still hanging out with that new girl? Haven’t you finished that biology work yet?”

The question doesn’t bother her as much, however the tone that Amanda’s speaking in gives her the feeling that there’s more to the conversation than this.

“Uh, yeah. We finished a few weeks ago, actually. I guess she’s just cooler than I thought.”

Kim shrugs and leans against the locker, ignoring the way her words feel wrong, because Trini deserves to be described as something more deep-rooted than ‘cool’.

Amanda scrunches up her nose at this, shuts her locker door and gives her full attention to Kim. In a split second, she goes from confusion to utter realisation to shock. She doesn’t like the lingering look of surprise, especially when she doesn’t know what it’s for.

“Kim, you don’t have a crush on this girl, do you?”

Her eyes widen, mostly out of consideration of this question being a possibility, and Amanda reads her expression as a confirmation and then there’s something close to disgust on her face.

“What? No way! You know I’m not…” She can’t finish that sentence, because she doesn’t know what she is and she doesn’t want to lie.

“Good. You had me worried there for a second,” Amanda pauses, and Kim thinks that the conversation is going to be dropped, “Do you think she has a crush on you.?”

That causes another reaction similar to before to develop, except this time there’s no denial leaving her lips. Somehow, the thought of Trini having a crush on her isn’t the worst thing in the world.

For Amanda, it is apparently.

“Gross! There’s no way I’m going to let her get away with this.”

“Amanda, don’t—.”

“Don’t worry, Kimmy. I have it all under control. I’ll see you at practice!”

Before Kim can come out with anything that will put a stop to her friend’s diabolic mind, the girl is walking away and rounding the very next corner, leaving her to wonder how bad things can get.

———————

Things are terrible. Worse than terrible — they’re horrific!

Kim doesn’t know when Amanda had the time — what with classes and then also cheer practice — she somehow found the time to commit vandalism.

If this were only a minor thing, like the meaningless insults thrown out during the day, she wouldn’t care, however _this_ is big. She knew Amanda said she was going to make Trini’s life a living hell, she just never expected…. this.

Written across Trini’s locker in red marker is a word so vile that the moment Kim saw it, she felt her blood begin to boil beneath her skin. There’s only one person who would do something this cruel, and knowing that she may’ve had a small part in it only causes the anger to rise in her throat. Some towards herself, and the other towards her best friend.

Right now, however, the only concern she has is getting rid of those marks before Trini can see it. Kim’s grateful that their coach decided to let them off early, giving her enough time to start rubbing off the words. She’ll deal with Amanda later.

After raiding the nearest janitors’ cupboard and getting the essentials needed — spray and a rag— Kim started relentlessly rubbing against the metal surface until one of the letters began fading away. Her arms are already sore by the time it’s gone completely, but Kim’s never been one to give up.

Only three more letters to go.

She’s about halfway through the second one when the sound of footsteps coming from down the hallway and abruptly stopping catches her attention. Then there’s a voice.

“Kim? What are you doing?”

Shit, Kim thinks. It’s Trini.

“Oh, me? Nothing.” Kim turns, attempting to give her best nonchalant smile while covering a good portion of Trini’s locker, where the last few letters remain embedded.

“That doesn’t look like nothing. Why are you cleaning my locker?”

“What are you doing out of class?”

Kim asks instead of answering. Maybe diverting the conversation will work?

(It doesn’t).

Trini’s gaze drops to where her now red stained hands are, and like usual whenever the small girl merely glances her way, Kim feels incredibly self-conscious.

Her question goes unacknowledged, and Trini’s suddenly stepping forward into Kim’s space, trying to push her to the side by pushing at her side.

“Trini, wait. I don’t think this is a good idea!”

“Kim, move!”

Trini’s eventually able to nudge Kim out of her spot, and when she does, Kim readies herself for the inevitable downfall that is about to occur.

She straightens her posture and turns to see a typical blank expression belonging to Trini, however the crinkling of her forehead gives away that’s quite possibly on the verge of either tears, which would be a first for Kim. It’s not something she wants to see, ever, simply thinking about it has her filled with guilt.

“I’m so sorry, Trini. It’s just… Amanda..” Kim opens her mouth to continue, only for it to close. She doesn’t know what else to say other than ‘I’m sorry’, but she can easily see that the damage has been done.

Trini just stares at the half-written word, her hands balling up into a fist by her side. It’s silent for some time, and Kim’s about to spur out another apology when Trini finally finds the will to talk. Her voice is laced with pain and cracks, like she’s close to crying.

“Did you… Did you know about this?”

“No way. If I did, I would’ve stopped her. I just— I should’ve saw it coming.”

At that, Trini manages to shift her gaze and turn the undeniable anger to Kim. “What does that mean?”

Kim falters, visibly hesitates in choosing words that won’t further the situation when all she wants right now is to put a stop to this.

“Amanda, she asked about you and—“

“What did she say, Kimberly?”

Again, Kim pauses, chews on the inner side of her mouth to distract herself from the way Trini is scowling at her and the use of her full name.

“She asked if you had a crush on me and started freaking out when I didn’t answer.”

There’s a prolonged second of silence, dragging on for far too long that has Kim fidgeting in the spot. Tugging on the hem of her cheerleading skirt as she doesn’t know what else to do with her hands. Trini’s doing the same for the most part, staring into nothing like she’s processing everything. Kim despises how she looks so fragile, her already small stance adding to the impression that she’s seconds away from shattering into a million pieces.

“Trini, I’m so sorry.”

Kim steps forward, moving with her hand extending out to rest on top Trini’s shoulder. Before her fingers can even brush the fabric of her jacket, the smaller girl flinches away, as if Kim’s touch is burning to her.

“This was a mistake.”

“What?”

“You and I being friends was a mistake, Kimberly.” 

She feels her heart ripping down the middle at the harshness of Trini’s tone and her words. It hurts more than the day she found out her parents were getting a divorce and that her dad was moving all the way across town. Kim spent the reminder of that night crying into her pillow and right now, the urge to do exactly that is rising.

“You don’t mean that.”

“I do.” Trini’s quick to retort, refusing to put down the walls that had been brought up the second she saw those words sprayed onto her locker. “Let’s just….stop hanging out, okay? This was never going to work.” Trini shakes her head and then she’s gone, walking down the hall and disappearing through the doors.  


Kim wants to ask what she means, an explanation of this sudden shift in their friendship, but deep down she knows the reason. Trini had mentioned it the first time they hanged out, expressed her low opinion on cheerleaders and how they’re nothing but trouble. As long as Kim wears that uniform, all she’s going to be to Trini is an entitled bitch, even if she’s not as vocal about it as Amanda. She’s just as guilty for letting this happen. 

She doesn’t know how much time passes before the last bell for the day rings and snaps her out of her own thoughts, pushing the abundant amount of remorse to the back of her mind, for her to think about later when she’s unable to sleep. Trini’s locker is still defaced, so Kim does what she can to stop the whispers of rumours from growing to the point of no return. She rubs, rubs and rubs until the cloth is no longer its original grey hue and instead red. 

———————

The days pass by in a blur after Amanda’s stunt. Her and Trini don’t hang out anymore, and she stops looking at the back of the room in Biology after a handful of failed attempts to get Trini to talk to her.

Kimberly tries not to think about it much, to put her mind on other things as a distraction, but most of the time it’s futile. When she’s with Ty, her thoughts go back to the small girl and her customary frown, the one that shouldn’t have her stomach doing somersaults. When she’s with Amanda, the girl who’s almost always talking nonsense, Kim shuts her out and thinks about the one voice she misses hearing constantly teasing her.

She feels like she’s back to where she started. Only being known as the head cheerleader with good looks to backup her entire existence. The turning of heads in hallways aren’t as satisfying like they used to be, not when there’s one person whose attention she wants. 

With Trini, there was no pressure to keep up this act that she’s some indestructible girl who cares just about her social status in high school, and which jock she’s going to go with to the end of year dance.

She’s walking out the school with Ty one day, his arm slipped around her waist, when she sees Trini waiting at the bottom of the steps. She actually manages to make eye contact with Trini for the first time in weeks, and her heart squeezes against her chest. Kim’s considering going up to her, but the limb around her body and husky voice in her ear has her remember that she’s not alone.

“There’s that dyke.” Ty whispers and that sensation of yearning that’s pressing against her ribcage is replaced with dread. Trini hears, Kim knows she does from the look of hurt across her face before turning and walking away.

After that, she stops hanging out with Ty. Tells him that whatever they had isn’t going to work out and that he’s not her type, and yeah, it is the truth, but she can’t stop thinking about _who_ really is her type.

———————

“You feeling okay, Kimmy? You’ve been really out of it lately.”

They’re in the middle of cheer practice when Amanda (finally) starts a conversation that doesn’t revolve around her for a change. Although it is nice, possibly comforting to know that her friend does have a heart, Kim isn’t really in the mood to have a heart to heart, especially not with the person who’s mostly to blame for her

Kimberly finishes taking a long sip from her drink bottle. “I’m fine. Why?”

“Ever since you stopped hanging out with that lesbo, you haven’t been the same. It’s almost like you miss her or something.”

Whether it’s from Amanda’s obliviousness, or the fact that she still thinks it’s acceptable to use language like that, she doesn’t know, but something causes Kimberly to snap.

“Are you really that stupid, Amanda? Why do you think it’s okay to make fun of someone who’s done literally nothing to you? _Trini_ is amazing, unlike you. She’s nice, funny and in the short time I’ve spent with her, she’s been a better friend than you will ever be. And who gives a shit if she is lesbian? This isn’t the nineteen twenties, you can drop the homophobic act.”

Kim doesn’t stick around after her little outburst, gathering up her ruffle bag on her way out of the stadium. There’s a whirlwind of emotions going through her, mainly all fixated around the girl she’s spent weeks apart from. She’s never been so engrossed about a single person before, not even with the previous boys she’s dated. Never has there been a spark like the one she shares with Trini.

It’s taken multiple incidents and Amanda running her mouth for her to realise that she hasn’t been so hung up over Trini for strictly platonic reasons. There’s more to it, although at the moment she doesn’t know what to make of it. The only concern she has right now is going to clear things up with Trini, and there’s really one place that she spends more time at than her actual house.

The quarry.

Half an hour later of driving and then climbing up to the spot Trini showed her weeks ago, Kim’s eventually made it to the top. A sigh of relief escapes her when her assumption of Trini being there is right.

She’s there, headphones on blaring loud metal music, while she participates in some yoga. It’s oddly a sight for sore eyes.

Kim stands off to the side for a good minute, watching as Trini moves from position to position, completely unaware of the cheerleader’s arrival She realises how creepy this is going to look if Trini notices her first, and she doesn’t want to add another reason for the girl to hate her, so she quickly makes her presence known.

The music booming through her headphones has her thinking that any attempt of speaking will be pointless, so Kim goes for the grab Trini’s attention another way. It takes her back to the day they were standing near her locker when she goes to tap Trini on the shoulder, only this time she doesn’t wince away. She jumps, slightly.

“Kimberly! What the hell are you doing here?”

Although it’s not the greeting she expected, Kim’s just glad to hear her voice again.

“We need to talk.”

Trini tugs her headphones off, which is a gesture for Kim to keep talking. That’s what she does, though the intention she’s trying to get across falls dead at the tip of her tongue. She hadn’t expected to actually get this far, thinking that Trini would tell her to leave the second she approached her, but here she is.

“I want you to know how sorry I am for everything. For making Amanda think that you.. like me. It wasn’t my intention, and it certainly wasn’t my intention for her to do what she did. It wasn’t right.” Kim stares at the pebbles near her feet, finding it easier than to face Trini’s relentless gaze. “But I also want you to know that being friends with you was the best decision I’ve ever made. You made me happy, more than anyone ever has, and I think that’s what makes it so difficult for me to let you go, and I can’t ignore how you… make me feel, Trini. You’re not just my friend, you’re more than that."

Her hands clench into a tight fist, digging her nails into the flesh of her palm to divert attention away from the current tightness in her chest.

“What about that boy you’re seeing?”

Kim shakes her head. “I'm not seeing Ty anymore. He doesn’t make me feel the way you do.” The confession has her heart beating all through her body, drumming loudly in her ears. It’s all she can hear before Trini’s moving, stepping forward and cupping Kim’s face in her hands. At first, Kim thinks that she’s about to be punched, but the softness of Trini’s grip tells her otherwise. 

Then Trini’s kissing her. It’s soft and sweet, everything she’s ever dreamed of and over before she can will herself to return the kiss. Trini pulls away almost as quick as she leaned forward, which leaves Kim rather disappointed.

“Does that mean you feel the same, or?”

Trini smiles, steps back slightly to push her hand into Kim’s shoulder, albeit playfully.

“Yes, you idiot. I like you. A lot. And I was never mad at you, I didn’t want you to find out the truth, so that’s why I freaked out when I saw my locker.” 

Kim furrows her brows at the uncertain look covering Trini’s face.

“I just didn’t know if you liked girls.”

Ah, right. She forgot about that part. The bewilderment of what she is is still there, but it’s not important right now. She has all the time in the world to figure that out.

“I didn’t know either, actually. Not until I met you.”

“Shut up, that’s so cheesy.”

“Maybe, but you love it.” 

They both laugh until there’s a silence that falls over them, except this time it doesn’t hold secrets. It’s comforting.

Kim takes Trini’s hands into hers, smiles when their eyes meet.

“Are you sure this is what you want? A lot of people are going to have something to say about this, people who are like Amanda.”

She frowns, remembering the words that had been written onto Trini’s locker. There’s going to be more of that, Kim knows, but she doesn’t care. She’s tired of being afraid to be her true herself and if by doing so ends up with insults thrown their way, so be it. Whatever comes their way, they’ll face together.

“I don’t care about what anyone else has to say. I want you, Trini. I want to be with you.”

Kim squeezes the smaller girl’s hands and brings them up to her lips, pressing soft kisses to the back of her knuckles.

“If you’ll have me..”

Trini nods, gives this smile that really shouldn’t be allowed. 

“I’d be an idiot to turn down the head cheerleader.” 

She smiles, wrinkles up her nose.

“That’s right. Not even you can resist the uniform.” 

Trini mumbles out a response but is silenced by Kim peppering kisses all along her face, from her forehead to the corner of her lips.

———————

The morning after, Kimberly stops and stares at her own reflection before she leaves for school, and for the first time in what feels like forever, there isn’t a sense of utter hostility against herself.

For the first time in weeks, Kimberly’s heart is content.

When her and Trini walk into school together, there’s really nothing that can put an end to the genuine happiness. There can’t be when she has the most amazing girl by her side, ready to face whatever obstacles come their way together.


End file.
